The Day He Destroyed Me
by LunaMaye
Summary: What happens when an encounter with Slade destroys the life of a Teen Titan? Can she recover? Or will she be forever haunted? R&R Slade/Rae, BB/Rae
1. Blackout

**I DO NOT OWN THE TEEN TITANS**

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_'How could I have let this happen, me of all people, why was it me? I could've stopped him, but I didn't. I wanted to stop… no I didn't want to stop him. Wait what am I saying… I didn't want that to happen, or did I? No, I mean of course not. It's not like I like him or something, I don't like him. After all the trouble he's caused us. I know I don't like him. Maybe I'm just scared; no I'm not scared why would I be…'_

"Raven… Raven are you in there?" came a voice at the door.

Raven lost concentration and snapped out of her trance. She used her powers to grab her cape and put it on quickly. She felt faint and a bit dizzy. She paced herself as she got to her door and opened it slightly.

"What do you want?" she asked Beast Boy very rudely.

"I was just coming to see if you were okay, you haven't been yourself since our fight with Slade a few days ago." Beast Boy said.

"I'm fine; I'm not acting any different than I usually do." Raven said.

"Okay, but just know that you can talk to me if you need to." Beast Boy said reassuring her.

"I don't need to talk about how I feel with anyone, especially you." She yelled at him.

"Alright Rae, I was just making sure." Beast Boy said tensing up a bit.

"Well you don't need to, just go away and leave me alone!" Raven said and slammed her door on Beast Boy.

She walked back to the center of her room and began to meditate.

_'Wow, that wasn't really called for, I mean he was only seeing if I was okay, I was really rude about it. It's nothe knows what happened, if he did know he wouldn't be asking me if i was alright, how would i be alright after what happened, it was horrible, i didn't even put up a fight, if the Titans knew they'd all thin differently of me, they'll think I'm weak. I'M NOT WEAK. I feel bad now, poor Beast Boy__._

_The least I could have done was not slam the door on him; well he shouldn't have been prying into my life. Okay he wasn't prying, but he knows I don't like to talk about my feelings. Wait, feelings, what feelings, when did my feelings come into play. I don't have feelings for anyone, no. No one at all. Especially not him, not after what he did to me. I knew he would sink low, but I never actually thought he would sink that low. I know he worked for my father and all, but he didn't have to hurt me the way he did..._

_Ugh! Why am I still thinking about this, I mean it happened four days ago, I should be able to forget about that day and just move on, it's all over, unless… what if he comes back for me, what he wants something more. I don't want him to hurt me again, what if my powers fail again and I can't stop him. I don't want to get hurt, not again. I can't, I won't. I…'_

--Blackout--

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**Alright so how is this for startign out, good? bad? Ok? Please review and let me know what you think. **

**I'll write the next chapter when I get some feedback. **

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	2. What's Wrong

**Flashback**

_Beast Boy was trying to put Cyborg back together as Slade gave Starfire a punch that sent her hurdling to the ground._

"_Raven, quick… fly ahead and track Slade." Robin called out to Raven as he assisted Starfire._

_Raven nodded and flew up ahead. She stopped mid in the sky and looked around, the treetops were to high to see through, Slade was out of sight. It was getting dark and there was a storm coming. The wind began to pick up and Raven decided it'd be better for her to walk instead of fly. She landed on the ground in the middle of the forest. As she walked she felt as if someone was watching her, she turned, but no one was there._

'_Calm down, it's just your imagination' she thought to herself._

_She had been walking for a few minutes and in return had found no trace of Slade whatsoever. She turned around to head back, but froze with fear. An eerie laught was blowing through the trees. Something was definitely out of place. _

"_Raven…" she heard her name as a slight whisper._

_She immediately went into a fighting stance._

"_Who's there?" she called out._

_No answer._

_She heard someone running behind her, she turned quickly, no one was there, then she heard it again, but from the opposite direction. She turned and this time was right in front of her enemy. _

_"Hello Raven..." she heard him say... and then_

**End Flashback**

"Raven… Raven can you hear me?"

Raven slowly started to open her eyes, everything was blurry and she couldn't make out who was standing over her. She blinked a few times and tried to focus until she finally saw Robin leaning over her. There were people behind him, but she couldn't make out who they were just yet.

"Robin?" she asked weakly.

"Raven, are you okay?" he asked.

"I, I think so. What happened?" she asked unsure of everything.

"I was gonna ask you the same question." he answered.

"I, I remember Beat Boy coming to my door, and then I was meditating, and then… nothing." she replied.

Cyborg walked in and stood with the others who Raven still couldn't see too well.

"Who are you?" she asked looking to them all.

"Friend Raven it is us, Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg, your friends." Starfire answered with a slight smile on her face since Raven was okay.

"Oh, I can't see you back there, my head is spinning." she said as she shut her eyes.

"Your test results came back Raven, you're fine, except they showed that you haven't eaten in a few days." Cyborg said holding a chart in his hand.

Raven looked around, she was in the Medical Wing, she didn't know it before, but now she could tell, her sight was coming back now and she could make everything out. She had small wires coming off her chest and arms that were hooked to a monitor.

"Raven is that true, you haven't eaten in days?" Robin asked very concerned for her.

"I guess." she answered.

Raven sat up, but regretted doing so immediately. She felt faint and fell towards Robin who caught her before she fell out of the bed.

"It looks like you not eating caused your blackout, but no worries, we'll give you an IV and you'll fine in no time, but I recommend you stay here for the night and rest." Cyborg said.

Raven nodded. She felt safe now; the Medical Bay was monitored by Cyborg so even if 'he' tried to get to her tonight, he wouldn't be able too.

The others left, except for Beast Boy who stayed behind; he wanted to talk with her.

"Uhm, Raven?" BB asked .

"What is it?" Raven asked very calmly.

"I know something's wrong." he said looking a bit scared.

Ravens heart sunk.

_'No, he knows… how did he find out, no he doesn't know… he can't know, there's no way he could've found out...'_

"Nothing's wrong Beast Boy, I'm fine." Raven said trying not to let her fear show.

"Are you sure Raven?" he said eyeing her.

"Y-yes, I am." she stuttered.

Beast Boy gave her a disappointed face and left.

_'I know that he knows that I'm lying, but I can't tell them, any of them. They just wouldn't understand. I'm safe for now and this will all blow over soon. No one will ever know…'_

Raven looked around the room. She felt comfortable and secure. She didn't feel like that in the comfort of her own room, she felt as though his eyes were always watching him, she was scared to sleep, but not now. Now she felt at ease. She nestled down in the bed and fell into a deep sleep.

**Meanwhile**

The Titans were sitting at the table waiting for Cyborg to finish cooking dinner. Starfire had just admitted how happy she was that Raven was okay.

"But guys, she's lying I know something's wrong with her, she's not acting the same." Beast Boy said in a worried voice looking at the rest of the team..

"BB you need to calm your little green butt down, Raven said she was okay, she probably felt sick, or got caught up in her meditation, forgot to eat, so she passed out." Cyborg said as he served everyone their dinner.

"I don't care what she said, I could tell, I know she's not okay, I'm not gonna sit back and just wait for something worse to happen to her!" Beast Boy yelled in an uproar.

"Beast Boy calm down, we're doing what we can to keep her stable, we have an IV pumping in her, she's going to be okay, you're just getting carried away." Robin said trying to cool Beast Boy down as he ate his dinner.

"You guys do what you want, but I can't just sit back and watch Raven suffer from what's bothering her." Beast Boy stated as he got up from the table without eating and started walking away.

"BB, where do ya think you're going?" Cyborg called out.

"To get some answers." he said and left.

He walked down the hall quietly until he was standing outside the door that was going to give him the answers that he needed, Raven's room.He went to open the door, but then hesitated too. He knew Raven would be angry if she found out he was in her room, but this was just something that he needed to do. He opened the door and walked inside. It looked no different than it usually did, the whole room was dark. There were candles in the center of her room in a circle. Books were everywhere. He walked around the room looking for what he needed. Cyborg and he had once stumbled upon it by pure accident, but this time he really needed it and of course, it was nowhere to be found.

He went to her bed and sat down.

"Now if I were Raven, where would I stash something that I wouldn't want anyone to find?" he asked himself outloud.

He looked to his side and saw what appeared to be a black leather book sticking out from under Raven's pillow. He pushed the pillow aside and picked the book up. His mouth dropped as he opened it...

"Raven keeps a diary!" he squealed.

He knew he shouldn't because it was a major invasion of privacy, but he'd already gone in her room without her permission, he might as well see what she writes about.

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**And there you go, second chapter**

**What did you think... please review and tell me if you think it should turn into a BBxRae romance later on**

**Hmmm... what's in Raven's diary? What's Beast Boy looking for? What really did happen to Raven? And why does Beast Boy care more than anyone else?**

**All will soon be revealed.**

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	3. To Nevermore

_The feeling of nothing_

_Hurts more than you'd think_

_The emptiness inside_

_Never goes away_

_The possible hope_

_Is soon forgotten_

_& people you thought you knew_

_Are never really there for you_

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"Wow, Ravens really good, I never knew she wrote poetry." BB said as he continued flipping through the pages.

The book was filled with all Raven's innermost thoughts and feelings, something Beast Boy didn't know she had. He finally stopped turning the pages when he came to the last page of her diary. His eyes bugged out when he read her words.

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_I should have turned back_

_I shouldn't have followed him_

_But I did…_

_My head told me it wasn't safe_

_But I persisted_

_When he touched me_

_My whole world fell apart_

_I just let him_

_I didn't do anything_

_He made me nothing_

_He made me worthless_

_He destroyed me_

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Beast Boy looked at the book and yelled at it.

"What did he do, Raven what's happened to you?" Beast Boy wailed.

He got so caught up that he failed to notice that what he was looking for was under her pillow where the diary was. He looked over and saw it, a giant smile swept across his face.

"Yes! I found it, the mirror portal thingy." He said and grabbed it.

Black and red beams escaped the portal and sucked him into it. As he was transferred into it the mirror fell to the floor on top on Raven's diary. Beast Boy fell with a thud into Nevermore. He sat up as he rubbed his head. He gasped when he looked around and saw that everything was darker and scarier than usual. He heard crying and followed the sound.

"Hello is anyone there?" he called out as he started walking.

No one answered, but the crying got louder, followed by screams. He began to run towards the sound.

"Hold on, I'm coming!" he yelled.

He ran and ran, the crying got louder and louder and then suddenly, it stopped. Beast Boy stood still as he saw what appeared to be a young girl huddled into a corner. She wore a gray cape and the darkness around her was strong. Beast Boy slowly walked up to her trying not to startle her.

"Raven?" he asked in a low tone.

The emotion turned quick, her eyes were filled with tears.

"Please don't come any closer." she cried as she tried to push herself father away.

"I'm not going to hurt you Raven." Beast Boy said staying where he was.

"I'm scared Beast Boy." she told him wrapping her arms around her legs.

"Why are you scared?" he asked her kneeling down on the ground to get to her eye level.

"He hurt me." she revealed.

"Who? Who hurt you? What happened? Please talk to me?" he said as he went to get closer.

"No! Stay away! I didn't do anything to you! Please don't hurt me… please?!" she begged as she began to sob uncontrollably.

"Raven, I would never hurt you." he said as he stood up and looked as if he was about to cry.

"I'm so sorry Beast Boy, so sorry." she said and disappeared.

"No!" he yelled, but she was already gone.

Beast Boy fell to the floor angry and confused. After letting a few tears escape his eyes he stood up and turned around. He stumbled back when he came face to face with another emotion; this one was wearing a yellow cape and had glasses. She looked fairly upset.

"You shouldn't be here." she said, "it's not safe."

"I don't care; I need to find out what happened to Raven." BB said.

"Very well." Knowledge said and summoned for Beast Boy to follow her.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

"Away from this part of Raven's head. Like I told you, it's not safe." Knowledge said as they reached her domain of Raven's mind.

"Who was that other emotion?" BB asked.

"That was Timid, and she's been over ruling her, when one of Raven's emotions is attacked it completely takes over." Knowledge revealed.

"So that's why Rae's been acting so weird lately? But she doesn't act sad."

"Raven is bottling up the fact that she's scared and so Timid is taking over her mind, causing her fear, right now she's in denial that she's afraid."

"What is Raven afraid of?" BB asked.

Knowledge sighed and looked at him.

"She doesn't want to be hurt by Slade again."

"What did Slade do to her please tell me?" BB begged.

**Meanwhile**

Back in the Medical wing, Raven was sleeping whilst someone else was outside the tower watching her.

"That's right, rest up now my dear because before you know it you'll be in my reach again." Came the voice of Slade.

Raven's head jerked up, her heart was beating wildly. She looked around the room.

'_I heard him, I know I did.'_

She froze in her bed when she heard footsteps coming from down the hallway. She quickly pulled the blankets up over her head.

'_Oh no, he's here, I knew he'd come back for me. I knew he would find me. Why can't he just go away?'_

The sound of footsteps stopped as someone entered the room. Raven clutched the blanket tightly as she waited for something to happen, anything.

"Rae? It's me, can I talk to you?" a very upset Beast Boy said.

A sigh of relief escaped Raven's lips.

"Oh, Beast Boy, I didn't know that was you. What did you want?" she asked.

"Uhm, well… I don't really know how to say this." BB said still standing in the doorframe.

"Just tell me." Raven said.

"Well, okay… Raven you were acting really strange and I got really, really worried and no one could give me answers. So I decided to find them out by myself, so I went into your room, read your diary, used your portal thingy to enter your mind and talked to knowledge after meeting Timid who has completely taken over you, and I know you should hate me right about now, but I just want you to know that I only did it because I was scared for you and I'm sorry, and you're a really good writer and yeah I'll shut up now." he said in one breath and nearly collapsed.

Raven was speechless.

"Rae… please say something to me." BB begged, but Raven remained silent.

"I'm sorry for what he did to you Rae, I'm really sorry, you didn't deserve that and I can see now why you were acting so strange. Please talk to me Raven." he continued.

"Why would you do that?" she managed to say.

"I'm sorry Raven, but I was really worried about you. I had to find out." BB said as eyes got watery.

"So, now you know… who else did you tell?" she asked.

"No one, it's not my business to tell them. But you should really let them know, if Slade's trying to play some kind of game so far he's winning."

"No! No one else needs to know, you're not even supposed to know, I can't believe you did that Beast Boy! What were you thinking?! Have you no respect for me at all?!" she yelled now sitting up and looking like she was about to lunge out at Beast Boy.

"Raven I'm sorry, but I had too." Beast Boy said as he backed up a little bit.

"Why did you have to?!" she screamed.

"Cuz I did!" he yelled back.

"Tell Me!"

Beast Boy couldn't hold what he had to say in any longer, he was going to tell Raven the truth.

"Because I love you, are you happy now Raven I LOVE YOU! You may think that no one around here cares for you or anything, but I do, I'm always worried about you, especially when you started acting like this." Beast Boy yelled and then realized that he had said much more than he wanted to.

He turned around and ran to his room leaving Raven stunned.

'_Beast Boy… he loves me.'_

Raven started feeling dizzy and fell back into the bed. This had been too much for her to handle.

'_I really am a horrible person, he was just worried for me, and what did I do, I yelled at him and made him feel like I didn't need him at all, but I do, I need them all, but I can't tell the rest of them. I can't.'_

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**So there's chapter 3 **

**What do you think??**

**I need some reviews before I write the next chapter.**

**Give me some ideas too for what could possibly come next between BB and Rae  
**

**And what happened to Raven will be revealed soon, although you should have figured it out by now and if not you'll just have to wait D**

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	4. Raven Speaks

Beast Boy was running to his room when he ran into Cyborg and Robin, he fell to the ground and looked up at them.

"BB, are you… crying?!" Cyborg asked and started laughing.

"No, why would you think that?" he said very defensive.

"Beast Boy, why were you running?" Robin asked curiously.

"It's nothing okay." Beast Boy said as he turned into a dog and ran to his room.

When he got in his room he turned back into himself, slammed the door, and quickly locked it before anyone could follow him.

"What did I just do?" he asked himself out loud, "of all the people, I tell Raven that I love her, she's probably laughing at me right now. I'm such a loser."

Beast Boy collapsed on his bed, turned into a cat, and huddled underneath his blanket.

**Meanwhile**

Raven laid in the bed, she was scared and confused. She heard footsteps approaching again. She tensed up a bit, but was fine when she saw Robin and Cyborg. Cyborg went to the monitor on the side of her and looked at it.

"Everything seems okay Raven, as soon as you feel like it you can leave." Cyborg said.

"If its okay with you guys I'd like to spend the night here." Raven said.

Robin smiled at her.

"Okay Raven." he said.

Cyborg was about to say something else, but the Titan's alarm went off. Raven went to get up, but Robin went to push her back into the bed.

"No Raven you should stay here and rest." Robin said.

"Okay." Raven said feeling completely relieved as Robin and Cyborg ran out.

'_That was close, what was I thinking getting up, what if it's him, I really don't wanna see him. He would've taken me again. I just need to stay right here until I forget about everything.'_

Raven pulled the blankets back over her head and tried to fall asleep.

**Meanwhile**

Robin pounded on Beast Boy's door.

"Beast Boy come quick. The alarms going off." Robin yelled as he waited outside BB's door.

Beast Boy crawled out from under his blankets and stretched. He turned back into himself and answered the door.

"Come on Beast Boy let's go." he said and they both ran down the hall.

The Titans got to the center of town when they saw Cinderblock.

"Titans Go!" Robin yelled.

As the battle took place someone was watching over Raven. She looked so peaceful as she slept, so calm. She was clueless that he was in the same room as her. He walked along her bedside and sat next to her. He pushed her hair back as he watched her sleep. Raven awoke, but didn't open her eyes.

'_He's here, he's in this room…he's touching me!'_ she screamed inside her mind.

Raven didn't want to open her eyes; she didn't want to see him, not now. She felt his hand glide along her face. His touch was smooth, almost like… skin. He was starting to caress her, placing his hand on her breast which set an alarm off inside her mind. She slowly began to open her eyes and gave him an evil stare which he laughed at. He smiled down at her and removed his hand.

"Good morning beautiful, it's about time you woke up." he said in his disgusting voice which Raven loathed.

She jumped up and stood on the bed causing him to back up into the monitor. It pushed away and ripped the wires and needles out of Raven's skin. She winced in pain as she saw spots of blood fall on the bed. She pulled her arm in close to her body as the blood began to trickle down her arm.

"You must be careful now; you wouldn't want to hurt yourself would you?" Slade said to her.

"You've already done that for me." she said trying not to focus on the blood running down her body.

"Raven, Raven, Raven, did you really think I was just going to let you get away after what we did." Slade said as he walked toward her.

"We did nothing!" Raven yelled.

"Oh, quite the opposite. We did something, and you liked it." he said as he grabbed her legs forcing her to fall onto the bed.

"No, I didn't." she said as she tried to back away, but Slade crawled on top of her.

"Then why didn't you try to stop it?" he asked as his face was inches away from her own.

Raven didn't know what to say to that. She thought quick trying to change the subject.

"My friends will be back here real soon." she said still trying to push away.

"Friends, I would hardly call those people your friends." Slade said as he pulled Raven in closer to himself.

His body was now completely on top of hers. He was too heavy for her. She started breathing deeply.

"They are my friends and as soon as they get back here-" Slade interrupter her before she could finish.

"I'll already be gone by that time, you see Raven I sent Cinderblock downtown to distract the Titans, when I tell him to, he'll stop, but until then, me and you have to finish what we started." he said as he kissed her forehead.

"We started nothing, you took advantage of me." she said as she forcefully pushed herself out from underneath him and fell to the floor.

"I would do know such thing to a girl as pretty as you." he said and went to grab her as she ran for the door.

He caught part of her leotard and it ripped showing more than what Raven wanted him to see as she stumbled to the floor. Slade got up from the bed and went to snatch her again, but before he could she got up and ran down the hall. She ran as fast as her legs would take her. All she could hear was him behind her calling to her which scared her more than ever.

'_Why can't this be a dream, why can't I just wake up, this can't be happening, Cyborg, Robin, Starfire… BEAST BOY! Please save me.'_

She kept on running until something she just couldn't go any further. She fell on the floor and gasped for air. She shut her eyes and when she opened them she saw the face of evil staring back.

"What more could you possibly want from me?" she asked still struggling to breathe.

"I want a lot more from you Raven, which you are willingly going to give me." he said and lowered himself until he on top of her once again.

"I will never give you anything!" she screamed in his face.

"You did a few days ago." he said egging her on.

"You fucking raped me!" she screamed.

Slade stood up and smiled at her.

"And on that note I bid you a fond farewell, until next time that is." he said and vanished.

Raven slowly stood up, she was still covered in blood and not happy in the least bit. She dragged body back to the Medical Wing and fell to the floor beside the bed. She was too weak to get up. She shut her eyes and lost all consciousness. As she laid there the Titans entered the house.

"That was kinda awkward." Robin said scratching at his head.

"He just took off in the middle of the fight." Cyborg added.

"Yeah, why can't all criminals be like that." BB stated

Starfire flew down the hallway to see if Raven was awake. When she got there she saw Raven passed out on the floor, her monitor knocked over, and blood everywhere.

"Robin, Cyborg, Beast Boy, HELP!" she screamed as loud as she could.

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**The truth is finally revealed**

**Slade raped Raven, even though you probably already figured it out.**

**Hmmm... what could he still possibly want from her? What will she tell the Titans? How is she going to explain why shes on the floor covered in blood.**

**Read, Review, and tell me what you think **

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	5. Stay The Night

**Thanks for all the positive feedback everyone, sorry this chapter took a little bit long**

**Okay here it is...**

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Beast Boy, Robin, and Cyborg ran down the hall to where Starfire was standing. Beast Boy looked inside the room.

"No." he said in such a low tone that nobody heard him.

Robin and Cyborg pushed by him to aid Raven. Cyborg gently lifted her into the air as Robin examined the room.

"What the hell happened here?" Robin asked out loud.

Beast Boy gulped as he looked to Cyborg who was still holding Raven.

"Starfire I need you to come with me." Cyborg instructed her and she followed him out of the room.

"I don't like the looks of this at all." Robin said as he started to clean the room.

Beast Boy just stood there uncertain of what to do. He slowly crept out of the room so Robin wouldn't see him and went back to his own. When he got there Cyborg and Starfire had just gotten into the bathroom.

"Star, I need you to clean Raven up." he said as he lowered her into the tub and then turned to leave.

"I do not understand, why must I do it, what if I hurt her. She is covered in a lot of blood." Starfire answered biting her lower lip.

"It would just be more appropriate if you did it." Cyborg said.

Starfire nodded as Cyborg shut the door and went to Raven's room and got her night gown. When he came back he waited outside.

A few moments later Starfire came out and Cyborg handed her the night gown. Starfire took it and went back into the bathroom. A couple minutes later she emerged with Raven in her arms. She flew her back to the Medical Wing where Robin had just finished cleaning up. Cyborg grabbed Raven's torn leotard and followed Star.

"Lay her on the bed." Robin instructed her.

Starfire flew over and laid her down gently.

"Something happened here tonight." Robin stated as he grabbed the leotard out of Cyborg's hand and looked it over.

"Robin, do you think someone attacked Raven?" Cyborg asked staring at his unconscious teammate.

"I don't know, this just doesn't make sense, I mean it's our first fight in five days, Raven doesn't come, and we come back to find her like this." Robin said while his hand rubbed his chin.

"Well did you check the surveillance footage?" Cyborg asked.

"The tape's gone." Robin said.

They both stared at Raven as Beast Boy came back in the room and stayed out of sight near the doorframe. Raven's fingers started twitching and shortly after she opened her eyes. Her fellow Titans looked at her in dismay. She was sore in many places and her arm throbbed. She coughed a few times and no one said a word to her. They continued to stare, and she just couldn't take the silence.

"Why are you all staring at me?" she asked in a weak voice.

"Raven do you remember what happened to you after Cyborg and I left?" Robin asked.

"Nothing happened." Raven responded almost as quickly as Robin had asked her.

"Rae, you were laying on the floor covered in blood. Something must've happened." Cy added.

"Oh, I fell." she said trying to make them buy her story.

"You fell?" Robin asked suspiciously as he raised an eyebrow at her.

"But your monitor was knocked to the floor, and the blood from you was everywhere." Starfire added.

"Oh, well I had a dream and it scared me, uhm… I lost control of my powers and jumped up, I must've knocked over the monitor in the process." she said hoping they would stop questioning her.

"Then why were your clothes ripped Raven?" BB said in the corner and everyone turned to him not knowing he was there.

"I… I told you, I lost control of my powers." Raven stuttered.

"Then where's the tape?" BB asked not giving her a break.

"I was embarrassed, so I destroyed it with my powers, I didn't want anyone to see it." she said.

"Raven, tell them the truth!" Beast Boy yelled.

"That is the truth." she said sternly an eyed Beast Boy.

"Alright, that's enough." Robin said, "It's been a long day, let's all just go to sleep." he said, pushed everyone out of the room, and shut the door behind him.

In the hallway Beast Boy pulled Robin aside.

"Dude, you don't really believe that fucked up story Raven told you, do you?" Beast Boy said pissed off.

"Not entirely, but Raven obviously isn't ready to talk about it, so we _all_ need to respect that." he said.

Beast Boy rolled his eyes as he stormed his way down the hall and back into his room. Robin watched as he walked away and looked back into the room where Raven had just gone back to sleep. He knew something was definitely not right.

About three hours later Raven woke up in a cold sweat. She was petrified. What had happened between her and Slade was eating her alive. She needed to talk to someone… she just had to. She swallowed her confidence and left the Medical Wing. She crept down the hall quietly; she didn't want anyone to see her. When she reached her designation she knocked on the door as softly as she could.

"Beast Boy, please open up." she cried at the door.

When Beast Boy heard Raven's voice he got tense and mad. He didn't want to see her. He planned on opening the door and telling her to just go away, but had a change of heart when he saw her. Her eyes were deep and she was very pale. She looked completely miserable and all his feelings of anger towards her disappeared.

"Rae, what's wrong?" he asked.

"Can… can I come in?" she begged.

"Of course you can." he said as he motioned for her to go it.

She walked over towards his bed and silently sat on the corner away from the window. She kept looking over to it an eyeing it as Beast Boy walked over to her and sat beside her. He leaned back in his bed and she completely collapsed on top of him. She started shaking and crying. Beast Boy pulled her up until her head rested on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. Her crying ceased as he wiped the tears from her eyes.

"You were right." she said

"What do you mean?" BB asked a little confused.

"I'm not okay, I'm terrified Beast Boy. Slade wants something from me, something more than what he already took. I'm afraid, I don't want him to hurt me again." she whimpered.

**Flashback**

_"Hello Raven." Slade said standing so close to her that she could feel his hot breath on her forehead._

_Raven backed up as Slade walked closer._

_"Don't take another step." she said as she focused her powers on a fallen tree and lifted it into the air._

_Slade stopped as Raven positioned the tree over him. He chuckled to himself and took another step towards her._

_"I told you to stay back!" she screamed._

_"Make me." he said taunting her._

_"Azerath Me-" she started to say, but Slade ran towards her and locked their lips together._

_Raven lost her trait of thought and dropped the tree to the ground as Slade continued to caress her tongue with his own. Raven froze; she didn't know what to do. She finally realized Slade was kissing her and backed up, breaking the kiss. While she did she tripped over a tree root and fell to the ground. She stared up at Slade very confused as he walked forward and stood over her._

_"What… why did you do that?" she managed to ask._

_"I needed to know." he said._

_"Know what?" she asked still utterly confused._

_"If what I was feeling for you was real." he said as he knelt down to her._

_"I don't understand." she said as she tried to crawl back a little bit, but a large tree was in her way._

_"I've had this weird feeling lately Raven, and I think I possibly might have an attraction for you." he said as he got on top of her rendering her powerless._

_Raven was scared, she could hardly breathe, she couldn't use her powers. She felt Slade's body weight pressing heavily against her. She started freaking out._

_"Please, please get off." she stuttered._

**End Flashback**

"Raven, hello… can you hear me?" Beast Boy said as Raven snapped out of her daydream.

"Oh, sorry, I was just thinking." she said as a cold sweat dripped down her face.

"Raven, I won't let him hurt you again. I promise." Beast Boy said as he hugged Raven tightly.

'_I wish he wouldn't promise me things he can't control.'_

Raven stood up and walked toward the window as Beast Boy grabbed an extra pillow from the floor and put it on his bed beside his own. Raven looked back from him and smiled slightly.

"Raven, I would feel a lot better if you slept here tonight." Beast Boy said as he blushed.

Raven let out a sigh of relief.

"I'd feel a lot better too. She said as she walked back toward Beast Boy.

He had already gotten under his blanket and was waiting for her. She crawled in beside him and nestled her face into his pillow. She looked up at the window one final time and Beast Boy stared at her oddly.

"You okay, Rae?" he asked.

"I am now." she said as she shut her eyes and they both fell asleep.

* * *

**Ta Da, there's chapter 5**

**Well what did you think?... review and let me know **

**Fell free to give me ideas for later chapters too**

**Next chapter will be up as soon as I get some free time to write it, I recently started work so it may be awhile, but I assure you it will get posted as soon as possible thank you for reading**


	6. Slade Cares

The sun made its way easily through the blinds in Beast Boy's room. It was very early and the whole tower was silent. Raven woke as she felt little beads of light dancing along her forehead. She usually hated to wake up to the sun; she preferred to be completely in darkness. But she had been able to sleep easily for the first time since the incident with Slade. She opened her eyes to find that she was cuddled up beside Beast Boy. Her back was against his chest and his chin rested gently upon her head. One arm was draped gently around her waist while his other was underneath her keeping her close.

Raven turned over as carefully as she could so not to wake him up. She looked at him, he was so peaceful, and he truly cared about her. She lifted her arm and brushed his hair back with her hand. She let his blades of hair slide gently through her nimble fingers. She brought her hand down to his face and rubbed his cheek. He began to stretch and yawn.

"Morning Rae." he said as he laid his arm back on her.

He blushed and pulled his arm back feeling slightly embarrassed. Raven giggled then caught what she was doing and quickly stopped. Her cheeks turned a slight shade of pink and Beast Boy smiled at her.

"So, did you sleep okay?" BB asked her.

"Yes, thank you." she replied.

"For what?" BB asked puzzled.

"For letting me sleep here." she said and turned away from him.

"Anytime Rae, I'm always here for you."

The room went silent Raven went over to the window and looked out it.

"Rae, what's with you and the window?"

Raven turned back to face Beast Boy who looked a little worried.

"It's nothing really." she said a little defensive.

"Is it really nothing, or do you just not want to tell me?" he asked as he got a closer to her.

"I… I feel like he's everywhere. I go to sleep and I dream about him. I wake up and I see his face everywhere. I hear his voice no matter where I am. I feel like he's never going to leave." she confessed.

"Raven, I promise that I won't let him hurt you again." Beast Boy said as he got stern.

"That isn't something you can promise me." Raven said as a tear began to form in her eye.

"Yes it is Raven," he said as he grabbed her by the shoulders and gently shook her, "I'm not going to let him hurt you ever again."

Raven took a step back. Beast Boy looked down at the floor and then back to her.

"Raven, what I said the other day, I just want you to know that I meant every word, and I would honestly do anything in my power to keep you from getting hurt."

"I…" Raven couldn't find the right words to say.

'_I don't know if I feel the same… I think I do, but do I really?'_

"What is it Rae?" he asked.

"I feel…" still nothing.

'_Just tell him, come on'_

Beast Boy stood in silence with an awkward expression.

"I, I think I love you too." she finally managed to say.

Beast Boy blushed.

"Do… do you really?"

"I... don't know."

"How do you not know?!" Beast Boy yelled.

"Because, I don't know Beast Boy, I just don't know I'm confused about a lot right now."

"What are you confused about Raven?!" he yelled again.

Raven squeezed her fists together, her eyes were glowing. She stood tall and looked Beast Boy square in the eye.

"I was fucking raped Beast Boy, and by Slade of all people. I let it happen; I didn't even attempt to stop him. I let him take the only pure part of me. I know I could've taken him, I just don't know why I didn't. And last night he came here to the tower, and I had my chance to get back at him, but no, I ran away from him. I let him get the best of me… I… I don't even know who I am anymore." she said as she broke down and collapsed to the floor.

Beast Boy took a deep breath and knelt down to the floor beside her.

"Rae, I promise to do everything in my power to keep you safe." he said.

Raven looked up at him and said nothing. Instead she turned her attention to the window and stared at it. Beast Boy looked at the window, then to her, then the window again. His face tensed as he walked over to his dresser which was a few feet away from the window. He went to the side of it and transformed into a gorilla and began to push the dresser until it completely covered the window. Not a speck of light could shine through. He wiped his hands in an accomplished manner as he turned back into himself and turned back to Raven who smiled slightly, then yawned.

"You haven't slept much lately have you?" he asked as he frowned.

"Not really, except for last night." she responded.

"You're welcome to stay with me if it helps you sleep."

"I'd like that." she said as she smiled and hugged him.

Beast Boy's face went blank for a second, but then he snapped out of it. He hugged her back tightly, trying to savor that moment. She looked up and caught his eyes gazing back at her. Then her eyes slowly shifted downward to his lips. She leant up a little further and kissed him. His eyes widened as he fell into a state of shock. Raven was kissing him. He closed his eyes and kissed her back holding her closer and tighter. Her lips were soft and warm; they felt wonderful against his. She finally realized what they were doing and broke the kiss and turned away. Her cheeks turned a light shade of pink as embarrassment kicked in.

_'Did I really just do that.'_

"Beast Boy, I'm sorry I, I don't know where that came from."

"It's okay, I mean it wasn't bad or anything." he confessed as his cheeks turned a color that resembled her own.

**Meanwhile**

Cyborg was making his way around the tower inspecting the security. He didn't believe Raven's story and was thinking of ways to make the tower safer for everyone. As he was walking by the Medical Wing he decided to see if Raven was awake. When he went in she was nowhere to be found. He quickly took out his communicator and got a hold of Robin.

"Aye Rob, Raven isn't in here, can you check her room to see if she went there?" Cy asked.

"Yeah, I was heading by her room anyway." he said as he approached Raven's door.

He knocked on the door and waited to see if she responded.

"Raven, are you in there?" he asked.

There was no response.

"Raven?!" he called out a little bit louder

Still nothing.

"Raven, I'm coming in." he said as he pushed the door in.

The room was dark and empty, he called her name out again. She definitely wasn't in there. Robin quickly got back to Cyborg.

"Are you sure she isn't there Cyborg because she isn't in her room." he said and as he did he saw Starfire coming down the hall.

"Hey Star, you haven't seen Raven have you?" he asked.

"No, I have not seen friend Raven, is something not okay?" she asked getting faintly worried.

"We don't know where she is." Robin answered.

"Hey have either of you checked the roof?" Cyborg said over the communicator.

"No, I was just up there and I did not see her." Star answered.

**Meanwhile**

Beast Boy was lying on his bed while Raven laid beside him, her head resting peacefully on his upper chest. She was listening to him breath as he placed his arm around her waist. As he shut his eyes his communicator went off. He looked over to the side of the bed and whimpered he couldn't reach it. Rather than listen to Beast Boy groan, Raven stretched her arm over toward where the communicator was and levitated it into the air, dropping it in the palm of Beast Boy's hand.

"Yeah?" he asked into it.

"Hey, have you seen Raven anywhere?" Robin asked.

Raven pushed away from Beast Boy and over to the edge of the bed.

"Uhm, yeah she's with me." he answered.

"Where are you guys?"

"In my room." he said and Robin didn't respond.

He threw the communicator on the floor and crawled over to where Raven was, he went to place his hand on her leg, but she got off the bed.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"They're gunna be suspicious." she said.

"Of what?"

She gave him a stupid look.

"When do I actually go into your room." she stated.

"Good point," he said, "but considering what happened, they won't say anything about it."

"What are you saying?" she asked as her face turned pale.

"That everything will be okay after we tell them."

"NO!" she screamed, "You can't tell them."

"Raven they deserve to know." Beast Boy said.

"Beast Boy, I trusted you with that, please don't tell them."

"I have to Raven, they need to know."

"No, they don't, in fact I don't think you deserved to know either." she said as she opened the door and stormed out, not knowing that the other titans were right there and heard her yell.

She walked right by as if she didn't even see them and went straight up into her room.

Robin turned to Beast Boy who stared at the floor.

"What happened to Raven?" he asked in a serious voice.

Beast Boy refused to look him in the eye.

Up in Raven's room, Raven was meditating in the middle of the floor with all her candles and books surrounding her.

'_Why did I tell him, he's gunna tell the rest of them, they're going to hate me. They'll think I'm weak. Since I can't defend myself against Slade they won't want me anymore. If they kick me off the team I'll have nowhere to go. I'll truly have nothing. I thought I could trust Beast Boy, I really did, but I don't think I can, I can't trust anyone, nobody cares about me… no one.'_

Just then Raven's communicator went off. She got up and walked over to it. She felt disgusted the minute she opened it.

"I care about you Raven." said Slade as she dropped it to the floor.

* * *

**And there's chapter 6**

**Hope you liked it**

**Read & Review please **

**Hmmm... so Slade is stalking Raven, Beast Boy wants to tell the other Titans what's wrong with Raven, and Raven is still in shock.**

**Next chapter will be up as soon as possible **

**Oh and thank you to Raven'sDarkSide for being the first person to favorite my story**


	7. The Titans Know

"You! Haven't you done enough to me already." Raven said looking towards her communicator on the floor.

"Dear Raven, I only wish to help you." Slade said.

"Help me… you're the reason I'm like this, how can you possibly help me!" she screamed.

"I care about you Raven."

'_He must think I'm stupid or something. He doesn't care about me.'_

"Yes, I do."

"How… how did you do that?"

"Do what?" he asked.

"Why can you hear what I'm thinking, how can you read my mind." she asked a little scared.

"I'm a part of you now Raven, I can sense everything you're going through, I can hear what you're thinking. And I never meant to cause you all this pain Raven, I merely wanted to be with you."

"Be with me… why? There's nothing special about me." she said emotionless.

"Oh, but that's where your wrong Raven, there are many things about you that simply fascinate me."

Raven blushed.

"Really?"

'_Wait, what am I doing, this is Slade I'm talking to, snap out of it Raven, you're not desperate enough to talk to Slade about your problems.'_

"I can hear what you're thinking." Slade chimed in.

"Fuck." Raven whispered under her breath.

Slade chuckled; Raven calmed down a bit and sat on the floor beside her communicator.

**Meanwhile**

The other titans tied Beast Boy down to a chair. Robin and Cyborg stood in front of him, Starfire lurked in the back.

"For the final time, I don't know what's wrong with Raven!" Beast Boy screamed.

"Then why was she in your room?" Robin asked.

"Cause she needed someone to comfort her." BB yelled.

"Why did she need to be comforted?" Cyborg asked.

"She's been stressed lately." he answered.

"What's making her so stressed?" Robin asked.

"I don't know!" he yelled again.

"If you know what's bothering Raven tell us now." Robin yelled.

"Dude, I can't." he yelled.

"Friend Beast Boy please tell us what troubles Raven?" Starfire begged.

"Look Star, I can't tell you guys." Beast Boy said.

"If you can't tell us it means you do know what happened, you just don't wanna talk." Cyborg said.

"Alright, I know, okay. I know exactly what happened, but I can't say anything, I promised Raven."

"Beast Boy, if Raven's in trouble, we need to know what happened." Robin said as he got eye level with Beast Boy.

Beast Boy looked at him and opened his mouth to speak.

**Meanwhile**

"Raven, the things you write are beautiful." Slade said heart filled.

"Do you really think so," she asked, "You're the first person I actually read them too."

"I can't see why, they're magnificent, you shouldn't be ashamed of anything about yourself Raven."

Raven smiled as they continued in their conversation.

"Raven, I want to see you again, but this time I don't want to frighten you, and I don't want you to be afraid of me." he said.

Raven's hands tensed. She bit her lip as she swallowed spit. She kept her mind clear of anything and everything. She didn't know if Slade was playing a game, or if he was serious. He was the one that had hurt her so badly, but yet he was the only person who she could talk to. In a way, she wanted to believe that he was trustworthy. He seemed sincere, and if he wasn't, he was a very good actor.

"Slade… I…" she was trying to think of something to say.

"Yes?" he asked seeming eager in her answer.

"I…" She was interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Raven, can we talk?" she heard Robin's voice say.

Raven kicked her communicator under the bed.

"Hold on." she said as she put her hood up and walked to the door.

She slowly opened it so that only a small portion of her face showed. Robin had a look on his face that made her question to what was wrong. Over Robin's shoulder she could see Cyborg and Starfire.

"What?" she asked.

"Raven, are you okay?" Robin asked.

"I'm fine, what do you want?" she asked a little pissed off.

"Beast Boy told us what happened." he said.

Raven turned white.

**Flashback**

"_Don't be afraid Raven." he said as his body weight began to completely crush her._

"_Please don't do this to me." she begged as she started to cry._

_While on top of her, Slade managed to move his hand to her lower body. He slipped his hand under the bottom of her leotard. Raven winced and tried to fight back, but just couldn't. Slade smiled as he ripped the bottom part completely off. He let his hand glide along her outside making her squirm._

"_This will go by a lot easier if you don't fight against me Raven."_

"_I refuse to give myself up this easy."_

"_Then you'll simply put yourself through more pain then necessary ." he said as he persisted to stroke her._

_Slade smiled at her as she felt his finger persist inside of her._

"_No!" she screamed._

_Slade moved his fingers inside her smoothly and swiftly. Keeping it gentle until she got used to it._

"_Relax Raven, enjoy it."_

_He began to move in and out, hastily picking up speed until he got the urge to add another finger. He looked at Raven who turned away; she refused to give him the satisfaction of looking her in the eye, knowing she had been defeated._

_Slade finally did what she had been dreading and in one quick move, he slipped his own member into her. Raven screamed and clenched her nails into his back. The pain was too much for her to take. In and out, in and out, Slade showed her no mercy. Her insides felt tight against him, but it made him pound in harder to attempt in loosening her. To her it seemed like hours, but in retrospect, it was over in mere minutes. Slade stood up and stared at Raven who was lying helplessly on the ground. _

"_I believe my feeling was right." he said as he turned and walked away._

**End Flashback**

Raven suddenly got angry.

"I knew I couldn't trust that little green rat." she vented.

"Look Raven, we understand that you're not in the best mood right now, and that you must've gone through a lot. We're here if you need something… anything." Robin confessed to her.

"No, I don't need anything from anyone. Just go away, all of you." she said as she slammed her door.

'_He's lying, they're all lying, they can't help me, they don't want to talk to me. They think I'm weak, they think I'm pathetic; I knew this would happen… I just knew it.'_

"Raven don't worry about them." she heard Slade's voice say.

Raven got on the floor and reached under her bed. She grabbed her communicator and pulled it out.

"You listened to all of that?" she asked.

"You only threw me under the bed, you didn't shut it off." he said to her.

Raven smiled slightly as she grabbed the communicator and laid on her bed. Outside Raven's door the other titans looked at each other puzzled as they headed to the main room.

"She got really angry." Cyborg said.

"Yeah I didn't think she would be that upset." Robin said as he sat on the couch.

"I don't think Beast Boy told us everything he knew." Cyborg said as he rubbed his chin.

"There has to be more, I don't think nightmares of her father coming back to take over the world would get her that upset." Robin said.

"But why would Beast Boy lie to us about what happened to Raven?" Starfire asked.

"Because Raven made him promise not to tell us." Robin said as Cyborg and Starfire looked at him.

"Hey where Did Beast Boy go anyway?" Cyborg asked.

**Meanwhile**

Beast Boy was soaring over Jump City. He had transformed into a hawk and was searching the streets looking for none other than Slade.

"When I find you Slade, you're gunna pay for what you did to Raven."

* * *

**There it is, chapter 7. **

**What do you think, please review **

**This time I'd like to thank 4kitty101 for being the first person to put me on her favorite author list.**

**And thank you to Lord Bathory for the helpful review. **

**So Raven seems to be liking Slade, is it because she's vulnerable, or could she really like him? And Beast Boy lied to the other Titans and went after Slade by himself. How could that possibly turn out.**

**Nest update could take awhile, but it will get don. **

**God Bless You All **


	8. Held Hostage

Raven walked out of her room and headed into the kitchen to make some herbal tea. Cyborg was playing video games while sitting on the couch. Starfire was cooking… or creating something. And Robin was looking out the window with his hand on his chin; he appeared to be deep in thought. Raven brewed her tea and sipped it quietly at the end of the table.

'_No one's saying anything… why are they acting like nothing's wrong… Beast Boy told them everything… they should be mad at me.'_

Raven looked over at Starfire who smiled at her graciously. Raven raised an eyebrow to her as smoke escalated from the stove and Starfire squealed as she pulled her… whatever she made out of the oven. She threw it in the sink and mumbled some Tamarainian words at the sight of her fouled meal.

Raven got up and sat on the couch. She was on the opposite end of Cyborg and was closer to where Robin was standing. She used her magic to levitate a book from off the bookshelf in her room and brought it to her seat on the couch. She opened it up and hid her eyes behind it as Cyborg jumped off the couch and threw his gaming controller to the floor.

"Oh yeah baby, whose your daddy now. That's right I am I won! Boo yeah!" he yelled out in excitement.

This broke Robin's concentration.

"You finally get the high score?" Robin questioned.

"Sure did, Beast Boy can shove that up his lil green butt." he joked.

Raven's eyes twitched.

_'Are they trying to fuck with my head? They know what happened to me. Why aren't they saying anything, they're acting as if nothing happened… are they playing some kind of game?'_

"Raven… Raven? Hey are you okay?" Robin asked waving his hand in front of Raven's face trying to get her attention.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked sounding a little agitated.

"Uhm, I don't know, you seem distracted." he said rubbing his head.

"Yeah, I'm sure you already know why." she said as she shoved her face back into the book.

"Is it about yesterday?" Cyborg jumped in and asked.

"I know you guys know what happened, stop pretending like you're okay with it." she said while slamming her book shut.

Robin and Cyborg looked at each other confused while Starfire walked over and looked at Raven.

"Friend Raven it is okay what happened to you, we all understand. We are all understanding of why you were upset."

"Real funny Starfire, are you all trying to humor me." she said standing up and clenching her fists together tightly.

_'They don't understand… they don't know how I'm feeling… why would she say that… they all planned this… they think I'm weak… they're acting like they're sympathetic… well I don't need their sympathy.'_

"Raven it's not really a big deal, it's not like it will happen again." Robin said trying to calm her down, but doing the exact opposite.

"Not happen again… NOT HAPPEN AGAIN! If he gets his fucking hands on me it will happen again!" she screamed out.

"Please Raven do not be angry at Robin, we are all friends here." Starfire said trying to cool her down.

"Some friends you all are, stop messing with my head, you know what happened to me, why are you all acting like it's not a big deal?!" she screamed out.

"We didn't know it mattered that much to you Raven, we thought you'd be over it by now." Cyborg said.

"It takes a long time to get over something like this, what he did to me destroyed my life. I can't get over it just like that." she yelled.

"Well he's gone now and he can't hurt you anymore." Robin said.

"He's not fucking gone, he's stalking me, he wants more from me."

The titans looked at each other baffled.

"Are you serious… Slade fucking raped me; stop acting like he won't do it again if he had the chance too. You don't know what the fuck I'm going through here. It's not just some big joke… this is fucking serious to me!"

"WHAT?!" they all shouted at together.

Raven felt slightly confused…

"Wait, Slade raped you, Raven when did this happen are you okay?" Cyborg asked.

"That no good, piece of shit, fucking loser, he's gunna pay when we get a hold of him." Robin exclaimed as he pounded his fist into his hand.

"Beast… Beast Boy told you…" Raven started.

"That you were having the nightmares of Trigon." Starfire said.

"Oh…" Raven said as her cheeks turned a deep shade of red.

_'What did I just do…'_

"Raven why didn't you tell us sooner? When did this happen? Where were you?" Robin asked sounding worried and upset.

"I… I" she started, but couldn't finish so she changed the subject, "where's Beast Boy?"

"We haven't seen him since yesterday." Cyborg answered.

Raven's face drained of all color as she stumbled out of the room and ran to Beast Boy's room. When she reached his door she barged in without knocking and looked around. The other titans followed her in and watched her as she staggered around.

"Raven what are you doing?" Robin asked.

Raven ignored him and continued looking around his room. She knew where he had gone, but she didn't want to believe it. She looked on the floor, then the bed, and then over to his desk. Her eyes shifted to the dresser and her heart dropped. She used her magic to move it over a few feet so the window was visible. A piece of ripped notebook paper was taped to it. The titans looked at her in curiosity as she grabbed it.

**Dear Raven,**

**I meant what I said to you, every single word of it. I will try my hardest to make you believe me. If you're reading this then you should have a pretty good idea of where I went. **

**-Beast Boy**

"NO!" she screamed as she crumbled the piece of paper in her hand.

"Raven what's wrong, where's Beast Boy?" Robin asked.

"He… he went after him?"

"Who went after who?" Cyborg asked.

"Beast Boy… he went after Slade…" she answered.

"WHAT?!... by himself?... is he crazy!" Cyborg yelled as he looked on his arm for BB's signal.

"Is there any sign of him?" Robin asked as he grabbed his communicator and tried to get a hold of Beast Boy too.

"No." Cyborg said with a defeatist look on his face.

"Beast Boy, Beast Boy, can you hear me? Robin yelled in his communicator, "Raven we need you to…" he began as he looked up, but Raven was gone.

**Meanwhile**

"Ugh… ow… dude… what happened… where am I?" Beast Boy asked as he looked around.

He was in a small room and it was hard to see. He wasn't sure if it was because the light was a dim beam or if his swollen eyes were the reason. His head was pounding. He licked his bottom lip and he could taste blood which was beginning to drip down his chin. He looked down and saw that his knuckles were bloody and his clothes were torn. He also noticed that he was tied down to a chair and he couldn't move.

"Hello?!" he called out and then coughed.

Blood splattered out of his mouth and he tried to spit out the rest of the horrible taste.

"Why hello there, nice to see that you're finally awake." a familiar voice said.

"Whose there, show yourself!" he yelled.

"Now, I really don't think that you're in a situation where you should be yelling at me." said Slade as he walked out of the shadows.

"YOU!?" Beast Boy exclaimed.

"Don't you remember what happened?" Slade asked as Beast Boy's memories began coming back to him.

"Wait… I found you in the woods where you were last with Raven… what am I doing here?"

"Well after you took a nasty blow to the head courtesy of me I decided to bring you back to my home." he said with a smile.

"A blow to the head… dude look at me… it feels like you attempted to murder me." he said as he coughed up more blood, "Why wouldn't you just leave me? Why did you bring me back here?"

"Let's just say you're going to be bait for a certain little friend of mine."

Slade turned from Beast Boy and began to walk away.

"I swear if you lay one finger on Raven I'll fucking kill you." he screamed.

Slade stopped and looked back at Beast Boy. A devilish grin swept across his lips. He ran up to Beast Boy and kicked him in the stomach causing him to fly back and hit the wall. The chair broke with a loud crash and Beast Boy remained tied to the arms while gasping for air. Slade chuckled to himself and walked to the door of the room where a tiny ray of light was shining in. He stepped through the door and went to shut it behind him,

"I hope you enjoy your stay." he said and slammed the door locking it.

* * *

**Raven's secret is all out in the open now, the titans know, and Beast Boy went to fight Slade on his own and got caught 0.o **

**Please read & review **

**Next chapter probably won't be up for 2 or 3 weeks, but it will get posted **


	9. Living With The Enemy

The day seemed gray as the members of the Teen Titans moped about their tower. Beast Boy had been unheard of for almost four days and everyone was worried. His communicator had been shut off; it was as if he had just vanished into thin air. In Ops center Robin was sitting on the couch with his feet kicked up, but he was not relaxing, rather trying to think. Cyborg was fidgeting with the computer still determined to find Beast Boy's signal. Starfire slouched as she flew very slowly back and forth, as if pacing. She finally stopped and looked to Cyborg, she gave him a look which seemed to ask if he had found any trace of their missing friend, but he only frowned and shook his head. Starfire sighed.

"I do not like this at all, friends might we try searching the city again?" she asked with little hope emitting from her voice.

"We've already done that at least fifteen times Star." Robin said a little shallow causing Starfire to pout.

"Then we must try something else, perhaps posters?" she said with a slight smile.

"Posters?" Robin asked as he arched his eyebrow.

"Yes posters, I have seen posters on trees and wooden poles holding thick wires, and they say they have lost something and offer the reward if they are found and brought back."

"Oh, you mean lost dog or cat posters." Robin said.

"Yes, those are the posters I have seen."

"Well that is a good idea Star, but I don't think it will work."

"Awh, but why not, should we not at least try?" she begged.

Just the Raven emerged into the room and walked towards them.

"Robin's right Starfire, lost posters won't work, I already told you guys that I know how to find Beast Boy, please you must let me." Raven said.

"No Raven, that's what Slade wants, he wants us to let our guard down and have you go find Beast Boy, we're smarter than that, and I'm not gonna let him get you while you're alone."

"Robin please listen to me."

"No, Raven you can't go, I'm not gonna give him the chance to get you again."

"Well I'm not just going to sit around here like the rest of you and do nothing." Raven yelled as she walked away.

"Robin, what if Raven still goes to find friend Beast Boy, and Slade hurts her again?" Star asked as she shivered to the thought of seeing Raven laying on the floor covered in blood again.

"Not gonna happen Star, Cyborg put a tracking bracelet on Raven that she can't remove, if Slade dares to comes here again Raven can trip the alarm on the tracker an we'll immediately be able to help her, it 

also bounds her to the tower for the time being, I can't put her in danger again, I just can't." Robin sighed as he thought of how angry Raven must be at him for making her wear that bracelet.

"Damn it!" Cyborg yelled causing Starfire and Robin to turn their attention towards him.

"What happened?" Robin asked.

"I almost had it, I was so close."

"What did you have?" Starfire asked.

"I'm trying to reconfigure the computer to not locate Beast Boy's communicator, but to locate him by his DNA, and I was so close."

"Is that even possible to do?" Robin asked astonished to that thought.

"We'll find out soon enough."

**Meanwhile **

Raven meditated in the middle of her bedroom. She may have been forbidden to leave the tower, but a thought had occurred to her. If she could reach Slade through her mind maybe she would be able to save Beast Boy. And even if it didn't work it was still worth a try.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos." she chimed to herself over and over again.

'_Come on Slade I know you can hear me, I know you have access to my head, why aren't you answering me.'_

Her concentration was broken by her communicator going off.

"Dear Raven I was beginning to get worried about you, we haven't talked in what seems like forever How have you been?" Slade said as she opened the communicator.

"Cut the act Slade, where's Beast Boy?" she asked angrily.

"You mean your little green friend; I have to say I haven't heard from him."

"You're lying! Tell me what you did to him; I know he went after you."

"That he did, poor little kid, he didn't even stand a chance." Slade laughed as a tear formed in raven's eye.

"What… what did you do to him?" she managed to spit out.

"Would you like to see for yourself?" Slade said as a vision of Beast Boy was clearly seen when he turned.

Beast Boy seemed to be lying in a puddle of blood, his clothes were torn and dirty, and his eyes were puffy and swollen. He looked helpless, just like the life had been sucked out of him. Raven couldn't help, but blame herself, maybe if she hadn't kept her secret from the Titans this wouldn't have happened. Finally he coughed which gave Raven little hope that he could be saved.

"Oh my God what did you do to him? You're a monster, let him go."

"My oh my you sure do want a lot now don't you… but hey I'll tell you what, I'm in a good mood so how about a trade?" Slade asked as a sick and twisted grin crossed his face.

"What kind of trade?" she asked dreading the outcome of his answer.

"I offer up Beast Boy to the Titans and in return I get you… sounds fair to me, what do you say?"

"…" Raven was speechless. This was her worst fear come true.

"I need an answer before I change my mind." Slade said ticking his finger like seconds of a clock.

"…Okay"

"Good, Beast Boy will be lying in a place that only you know of; there you'll be able to get him."

"I can't leave the tower." Raven said as she showed the bracelet on her wrist to Slade.

"Then tell the Titans where he is and when they go to get him, I'll come for you."

Raven gulped as she nodded her head and the signal was disconnected.

Raven opened the door to her room and walked out into the hallway, she made her way down to Beast Boy's room and left a note on the window, then she left. She went back to Ops to find that the Titans were still in the exact places where they had been since an hour ago.

"I found him." she whimpered as she shielded her eyes from the others so they couldn't see her tears.

The Titans jumped at the news and were ecstatic, all except Robin of course.

"How?" he asked extremely curious.

"With my powers, do you remember where we fought Slade last time and I rushed into the forest so he wouldn't get away, that's where you'll find Beast Boy."

"What are we waiting for then, let's go bring'em home!" Cyborg said as he dashed out the door with Starfire behind him.

Robin was about to leave, but looked back to Raven and eyed her, he knew she was hiding something, he could just tell.

"We'll be back as soon as we get him, stay here and keep in touch if anything goes wrong." he said and left.

Raven watched as they disappeared out the door and away from the tower.

"Goodbye." she whispered faintly.

Raven phased up through the ceiling and onto the roof. She sat on the ledge and hung her feet over the side of the tower. She stared out over the horizon. She felt her heart crumble into pieces as she felt his presence approach her. She froze and her head went blank. She could hear his heart beep thumping; she could hear his mouth breathing. She stood up and turned to face him, but did not look him in the eye. She looked at the bracelet on her arm and then held it out toward Slade. He placed a small red device on it. Raven watched as it sparked and fell off her wrist. Immediately the other Titan's communicators went off, but by the time they got back to the tower, Raven was gone.

Beast Boy was placed in the Medical Bay and tied up to a heart monitor and an IV, he was in a great deal of pain. Cyborg watched over his monitors as Starfire tried to calm down an overly upset Robin.

"I knew it; I knew something like this was going to happen. Someone should have stayed here with Raven. I should have stayed. I knew she was hiding something, she knew Slade would come for her." Robin yelled at himself.

"Robin please the fault is not yours, you could not have controlled what Raven would do."

"No Star, but I could've done something more to help her. We all could have."

**Meanwhile**

Raven sat on the edge of a bed, in what she figured to be Slade's house. She found slight humor in it because she never thought of Slade to be like an actual person who owned a house. She looked at the pictures on the wall. They were elegant works of art. She never knew Slade had this kind of side to him, but then again he did appreciate the small thing that she did. She got up and walked toward what appeared to be a red velvet book. She picked it up an examined it very carefully. If she was correct, it appeared to be … a diary?

She opened it and flipped through the pages, inside were some of the most amazing poems and literature she had ever seen. On the last page she read something that opened her eyes.

* * *

_For a creature so dark and mysterious_

_I have what seems to be an attraction_

_But for reason she does not feel the same_

_My image to her is one I wish to take back_

_But never shall she give me that chance_

_I never wanted to take her by force_

_I thought maybe she was playing hard to get_

_But alas, I am the one who is wrong_

* * *

As she finished reading she noticed that the date was the same day he had raped her.

'_Could he really have a sensitive side I never knew of before?'_

"Maybe you'll find out." Slade echoed in.

Raven dropped the book and froze in place.

"Ah, I see you found my book."

"Your writing is amazing." Raven choked out.

"There's more on your mind then just that."

"I want to see Beast Boy."

Slade let a slight sigh escape his lips.

**Meanwhile**

Beast Boy wheezed uneasily in the hospital bed. Cyborg and the others had retired for the night leaving Beast Boy alone under high security. After what happened to Raven, Robin wasn't going to let another teammate get hurt.

As Beast Boy slept a shadow lurched over him. It walked towards him and sat beside him on the bed. A soft and gentle hand ran over his cheek awakening him from his rest.

"Rae… Raven?" he said in a weak voice.

"Shhh, don't speak." she said as she pressed a finger to his lips.

Beast Boy smiled, it felt so good seeing her face. He then let out an agonized moan; he started to feel faint again.

"Beast Boy, I'm sorry I put you in this mess, I hope you can forgive me, and I know that you went after Slade for me, but I have to be with him for now. I feel it will be better for the team if I'm not around, I'm weak."

Beast Boy was about to say something when Raven leaned in and pressed her lips to his. She then whispered into his ear.

"I don't think anymore, I know that I love you."

And before Beast Boy could open his eyes from the kiss, she was already gone.

* * *

**Sorry this chapter took so long to get up, I'm going to be pretty busy with school now, but I promise I will keep updating this story as often as I can  
**

**So what does everyone think? Reviews please:)**

**So Raven is living with Slade... and does Slade really have a sensitive side or could he just be playing Raven? And what about Beast Boy, she loves him... things are going to start getting intense.**


	10. Let's Bring Raven Home

**Three weeks later…**

"Hey Beast Boy, how are ya feeling today?" came the voice of Cyborg as he opened the shades above Beast Boy's window to let some light in.

"Ugh, dude it's too early." Beast Boy moaned as he tossed over and nearly fell off the small medical bed.

"Come on, you're fine now. Get up." Cyborg said as he made his way out.

"No I'm not." Beast Boy said as he slowly got up and looked at the window, "Where are you Raven?"

He turned away and tried to hold back a tear as he made his way out into the hallway. He felt a bit faint and couldn't help, but stumble once or twice until he made his way to the kitchen.

"Good morning friends, I am so happy that the team is all here now. Let us now eat the wonderful breakfast Cyborg has prepared for us." Starfire said in her joyous mood.

Everyone began to eat, but Beast Boy just stared at the chair that Raven normally sat in. He could picture it perfectly. She would be ever so still and stir her tea with her powers. Then sip it hesitantly and make rude comments to him as she read her book then retreat off to her room… he missed it.

"Come on BB, it's your first day outta Medical Bay and I even made you Tofu bacon and eggs to celebrate, the least you could do is eat." Cyborg whined.

"Huh,… oh sorry… guess I'm just not too hungry." He said as he poked his food with his finger.

Robin and Cyborg exchanged glances.

"Say Beast Boy, hows about we play some video games til' noon and then go out for some pizza, maybe even rent a movie later." Robin said in hopes of cheering up the sad changeling.

"No thanks… "

"Or perhaps friend Beast Boy would like to accompany me on a trip to the mall of shopping." Starfire said as she clapped her hands together.

"Look guys, I appreciate what you're trying to do… I really do, but I'm just not in the mood…" he said as he got up and tentatively made his way to his bedroom.

After he left Cyborg, Robin, and Starfire all looked at each other, they knew the one thing on his mind… Raven. As Beast Boy got to his room he paused a second, then continued walking until he reached Raven's bedroom.

"Raven always hated when I went in here." He said as he opened the door.

Her room looked as it always did, dark and mysterious… just like her. He staggered over to her bed and lied down on it. He buried his face in her pillow, it smelt just like her. He sat up and looked around.

"Raven… why did you leave us… why did you leave me…?" he asked out loud.

He waited as if she was there to answer him, he even asked again, but it was true, Raven was gone, and with Slade of all people. Beast Boy got up and left the room, being in there was too painful for him to handle. He made his way back to his own room and crashed in his bed.

"She said she loved me… if you love someone you don't just leave with guy who took something of yours… your innocence if anything… why would you just go with him Raven… I love you… you love me… give me a sign of how to find you… some clue so I know where you are." He said out loud.

All of a sudden he felt a draft in his room. He turned to see that his window was completely open and there a paper stuck to it blowing with the breeze. He jumped up and jetted over to it and snatched it off the window so fast that it ripped.

"DAMN IT!" he yelled as he put the two pieces back together, "Okay let's see what this says…"

**Beast Boy,**

**I'm going with Slade; it's my fault that you got hurt in the first place. If I was stronger he wouldn't have taken me, but I'm not strong Beast Boy. I'm weak, and the other Titans think I am too, why else would they try to bind me to the tower. They know I can't take care of myself. I will come back when I am strong… I promise.**

**~Raven**

"No, Raven... don't let it be so." He cried.

He sat up and crumpled the paper in his hands.

"I'm gunna get you back Raven. I won't let Slade control you anymore." Beast Boy said as he jumped up and fled out the door.

In Ops center Robin was sitting on the couch with Cyborg playing video games while Starfire hung over Robin's shoulder watching when Beast Boy came crashing in.

"GUYS GUYS GUYS!" he yelled which startled the rest of the team.

"Yo B whats up?" Cyborg asked as he paused the game.

"I need to find Raven, we need to find her. She has everything all wrong." He spit out.

"Whoa, calm down, what are you talking about?" Robin said.

"Raven feels like she let Slade take advantage of her, she thinks shes weak and pathetic, she thinks that all of us feel shes a waste of time to the team. We need to find her and show her that shes wrong and we want her back." Beats Boy said all in one breath.

"Why would friend Raven feel like this, we do not think any of this of her." Starfire said.

"She was raped Star, Slade took away something that she can't get back. She feels like she could've stopped him even though she really couldn't have." Robin chimed in.

"So how are we gonna get her back?" Beast Boy asked all eager to find her.

No one answered. They all pondered as they looked around the room. Out of the corner of Cyborg's eye, he saw a red light on the computer blinking and then he remembered how he was trying to track Beast Boy through his DNA.

"I might just have the answer." Cyborg said as he ran over to the computer.

"What happened?" Beast Boy shrieked as his face lit up, "Hey why is a picture of me on this?"

"I was reconfiguring the computer to locate you by your DNA rather than your communicator." Cyborg said as he pressed some buttons.

"And did it work?"

As Beast Boy asked his question, Cyborg flipped a switch and the DNA locator pinpointed Beast Boy to his exact location in Titans tower... just feet away from Robin and Starfire while he was directly in back of Cyborg.

"Yeah Man! It worked!" he yelled out, "Now all we need is something with Raven's DNA and we'll know exactly where she is."

"I know what to get." Beast Boy exclaimed as he fled out of his room and down the hall to Raven's room.

He looked on her bed, then grabbed her pillow, and ever so carefully picked up a shiny piece of short bluish-purple hair. He felt his heart beating in his throat as he ran back to Cyborg and handed it over. Cyborg put it into the scanner and Beast Boy watched over his shoulder as he pushed some buttons. He anxiously waited for something to happen, anything.

"What's wrong Cyborg, why isn't it working?!" Beast Boy yelled impatiently.

"Give me a minute... I... almost... got her!" he said as a siren rang out from the machine.

"Whoa... she's on the far outskirts of town." Robin said.

"Well what are we waiting for... lets go get her. Let's bring Raven home." Beast Boy yelled as all the Titans fled from the tower into the T-car.

**Meanwhile**

_...home... home... home..._

_I wish I was home... but I haven't a home... not anymore at least._

"Dear Raven, this is your home now." Slade's voice rang in making Raven lose her concentration and fall to the floor.

She had been meditating for a few hours.

"Oh, Slade... you scared me." Raven cried.

"I am sorry Raven, I forgot that you sometimes forget that I can read your mind." he said.

Raven was about to say something when she started feeling weird... she could hear voices in her head... and they weren't from Slade.

**_"We're coming Raven, we've found you, we're coming to bring you home."_**

_Beast Boy_...

"Beast Boy" Slade asked an eyed her suspiciously.

_**"We know it wasn't your fault Raven, you are strong, you are. What he did to you isn't your fault. I love you Raven, I won't give up on you."**_

Raven's face lit up.

_they want me back... they're actually coming for me... they don't think I'm weak...  
_

"Whose coming for you... what is the meaning of this... Raven you will answer me!" Slade yelled out as he flipped the table over separating them.

Raven ran from him into the other room and locked the door behind her. She felt Slade charge at the door and ram it as hard as he could which split the wood. She pushed her back up against it in hopes of stopping him from getting in.

"Please, Slade stop!" she cried.

"No you're not going anywhere, I'm not gonna let them take you. You Are MINE!" he yelled and broke through the door.

Raven ran to the other side of the room and was trapped in the corner... she turned around to see her ultimate fear stare her dead in the eye.

"If you know what's best for you, you'll do exactly as I say... because if I have to, mark my words Raven this will be the death of you." he said as he held a knife mere inches from her bare neck.

"You wouldn't do that to me... if you cared about me... you wouldn't keep hurting me like this..." Raven whispered as her eyes became overwhelmed in tears.

"People always do crazy things when they're in love." Slade replied.

"..."

* * *

**Finally I got another chapter up. YAY!  
**

**So sorry it took this long though.... I've been so busy with school work and what not. **

**Please review... if I don't get enough reviews I won't be updating this story anymore so if you like it you need to review!**


	11. Four Red Eyes

Three titans were in the T-car racing towards the location where Slade was holding Raven, whilst a green falcon flew overhead. Beast Boy had a wicked gleam in his eye as he thought of how Slade had affected Raven. All he wanted was to bring her home safe and sound. He longed to see her face again, to hold her, to tell her he loved her once more. He needed her to be okay, she had to be okay, and if she wasn't, Slade would pay dearly.

Starfire twiddled her fingers as she sat in the backseat of the T-car, she would've flown there herself, but after learning the truth from Beast Boy, she just couldn't. She and Raven were never close, but she thought she was someone Raven could go to. Raven was her friend, and she never thought Raven to be weak. Starfire sighed as she dazed out the window up at the green bird.

Robin and Cyborg sat in the front seat of the car. Robin pounded his fists together every few moments with a look of anguish and disgust in his eyes while Cyborg gnashed his teeth in rage. There Raven was in the hands of a monster and the worst part of it was she actually thought she belonged there.

**Meanwhile**

A very irritable Slade had grabbed Raven by her hair with one hand and forced her to walk to the opposite end of the house. With his free hand he held a knife mere inches from her bare neck. Sweat trickled down Raven's forehead; her friends were coming for her, but Slade…

Slade threw Raven into a closet where she fell to her knees.

"Now my dear Raven, I'm going to take care of the unwanted visitors. You will stay here and not make any sudden moves or a single sound."

"No, I won't." she argued as she stood back up.

Slade's eye seemed to pop out from behind his mask. He held the knife in his hand and gripped it tight.

"Raven… Raven… Raven you will stay here."

"You can't hurt my friends Slade, I won't let you." She said as she tried to run past him, but something prevented her.

Suddenly Raven fell to the floor; pain was rupturing in her right arm. Her nerves twisted and screamed out in pain. She grabbed at her arm with her other to notice it was soaked. She looked down as she felt a cool sensation dripping down her bare arm. She looked up to see that sick smile painted across his lips, the same one she had seen on that horrible day. Tiny droplets of blood dripped down the knife as he held it above her. A single tear formed in Raven's eye as she looked back down at her arm. She refused to look up at him anymore. He already had the pleasure of taking her, making her weak, and vulnerable. She couldn't let him know he was getting the best of her all over again.

'_Why… why am I so afraid… why can't I fight back…what's stopping me…'_

"Oh, I'll tell you why Raven. I took a part from you, something that is supposed to be sacred. Something that will leave any girl, even one that is a demon to be weak and vulnerable. You fear me because you couldn't stop it and it is your fault… all your fault."

"No, no its not, it's your fault. You made me feel this way. You hurt me. YOU DID THIS TO ME!" she screamed as she fell back.

Slade knelt down and crawled on top of her.

"If it really is my fault, then why do you still think it's yours?" He said as he pushed his lips to hers.

Slade stood back up and pointed to the closet. Raven looked at the closet and then back at him. She slowly managed to push herself in without standing back up. After she was inside he shut the door behind her.

"Remember Raven, no movements, no sound." He said, and then vanished.

Raven sat there as she clutched her arm against her chest tightly. She grabbed part of her cape and ripped it off. Then she tied it around her wounded arm. She winced at the sudden pressure. Only a few minutes had passed, but in her mind it felt like hours. The titans were coming here, they were going to fight for her, yet all she was going to do was hide in a closet under the orders of Slade.

"What's wrong with me, why, why am I listening to him?!" she whispered to herself, "He made me like this, he… he…" she couldn't stop from crying.

"My friends, my real friends, they don't think I'm weak… they… they never thought I was weak. They know I'm strong, but me… I thought I was weak… it was all me… I… I never wanted to believe that I was weak, but I am… sitting in a fucking closet listening to the things Slade tells me. This is what makes me weak. He played me… messed with my head. He knew how to get to me… he knew how to make me leave… but why… he couldn't really love me could he… you don't hurt the people you love…" Raven took a deep breath, "but that's exactly what I' doing isn't it… the titans care for me, they love me, and look how I repay them… hiding away while Slade tends to them… now I truly am pathetic… and I left the titans… they never left me… they've wanted me all along…"

Raven wiped the tears from her eyes.

**Meanwhile**

Slade had met the Titans in front of the building. A very aggressive Beast Boy swooped down from out of the sky and transformed into a tiger as he pounced on Slade.

"WHERE IS SHE?!" he screamed.

Slade replied to his question with a chuckle.

"Dear Raven is no more."

Beast Boy's heart crumpled into a million pieces and fell into the pit of his stomach.

"You're a liar, tell me where she is!"

Slade stood up and pushed Beast Boy off. Robin couldn't bare it anymore.

"Titans Go!" he yelled and they all leapt into action.

Three titans targeted Slade, but a slender green one took his chance to run into the building where he could sense Raven.

Robin came at him first swinging his bow-staff, while Starfire threw some starbolts, but Slade ricocheted away. Cyborg ran at him firing off his cannons, but something was wrong. All the titans seemed just a bit off. Slade could tell he quickly pulled out a small trigger and all the titans froze in place.

"That's right, you see this. With a flick of this switch your dear little Raven suffers imaginable pain."

Slade then snapped his fingers and an army of fifty or so robots appeared on the scene making it perfect for him to escape.

**Meanwhile**

Raven slowly walked about the house towards the stairs. As she did she could hear someone rushing up.

'_No…'_

She turned back and ran for the closet.

'_No, Slade please don't hurt me…"_

"Raven!" she heard a voice yell from behind her, but she kept on running.

She sprang for the closet and pulled the door shut. Someone was in the house. She could hear him walking around, looking for something… someone… her.

Then she heard something else, there was another person present in the house, one of them was definitely Slade.

"Haven't you ever heard of knocking before you enter someone's house?" Slade asked the teen who looked ready to kill someone.

"Cut the shit Slade, where is my Raven?!"

"Your Raven? Oh no, I believe you mean MY Raven."

Beast boy jumped up and grabbed Slade by the throat.

"You tell me what you fucking did with her right now!"

Slade grabbed Beast Boy and flung him away; from inside the depths of the closet Raven could hear something break. She then heard someone fall very hard, there was glass breaking, something else breaking… maybe wood… no, bones? She held herself tightly as she squeezed her eyes together. She knew it was Slade with Beast Boy, she knew he was suffering pain… he was taking it for her…

Beast Boy began to cough, his chest was throbbing, he knew he had broken something. He tried to bring himself to stand up, but just couldn't. Slade came to his side and kicked him so hard he went flying into the next room where Raven hid. She saw him lying there, full of blood… full of pain. She was close to him, so very close, but yet so very far away.

Raven's head went blank; she could feel something building up inside of her, her head was screaming to get up, to do something. How long was she seriously going to sit there and watch this happen? Beast Boy, he loved her and he was taking all this pain for her, but he'd taken enough, she's taken enough, but Slade… oh he was going to get what was coming to him.

The doors of the closet burst open and a in the midst of it stood a figure with four gleaming red eyes.

* * *

_**Sorry this took so long to update, but thank you so much for all the awesome reviews.**_

_**You guys are great!**_

_**Oh and to Brynnie-Chan124, I'll take my cookies now ^.^**_

_**Please Review, I love knowing what you guys think!!!**_


	12. Raven Gets Even

_**Okay so you all must hate me for taking so long to update this ::quivers in corner::**_

_**But do not fret because I finally wrote another chapter!**_

_**So please read on I hope you all enjoy!!**_

* * *

A creature stood in the center of the closet, dark energy pouring out from all around it. Four immense, red eyes beamed into the room. There was no noise, not a word was spoken, not a breath was taken, there was dead silence. Beast Boy laid on the floor looking up at a lost, demon child who was caught in a trance of pain. Slade stood a few feet away from the boy and the demon girl he glanced at the big, red eyes then at the Boy on the floor, they weren't aimed at him. Slade took a subtle step back, fear leaping in his chest; he had never underestimated Raven, until now.

A voice arose out of the body of the girl once known as Raven, a dark and sinister voice that resembled the one of her father.

"You took advantage of me…" the devilish voice breathed as all the painful memories flooded through her head.

Slade swallowed hard as he took yet another step back.

"You used me, got the best of me, stole my dignity, flat out fucking made me into something I loathe, something worthless and undeserving. But it's over Slade; I'm not your little toy anymore." Said the voice as it faded back into Raven's normal tone, "And to think for a split second I thought you loved me, but you don't, you never did, all you accomplished was finding my one weakness, sad part is Slade, I no longer fear you."

"You sure?" Slade ask as he flung a knife he has been concealing in his back pocket straight at Raven.

"Positive." She replied as she caught the knife with her powers in mid air and let it drop to the floor.

The knife made a clang and in an instant Slade jetted out the house. As he got outside he was aroused to find the other titans still occupied by his robots. He thought he could get away unnoticed, that is until Raven screeched onto the scene in her Raven form.

Slade's body froze; he was scared trying to anticipate what she was going to do to him.

"Do you know what it feels like to have your dignity ripped from you?" she asked in a deadpan tone.

Slade shook his head slightly to say no.

Raven smiled, "Let me show you." She said as she enveloped him in her powers and threw his body into the side of the building where she had been held captive.

"You think it's funny to fuck with me?!" she screamed as she grabbed him from the wall and crashed his body into the ground.

"You thought this was all a fun little game?!" she yelled out as she held him in midair debating on a suitable punishment.

Something was boiling deep inside her, she was feeling something, some type of emotion that had never had this much control over her before. An emotion that was composed of all of her fear, all of the hurt she had suffered, all of the pain she had to live with, all the guilt she carried, all her self-loathing. An emotion she felt to be revenge. A painful revenge, one Slade would never forget; A revenge to make him cower in fear of her like she had of him. Oh all the things she wanted to do to him, but just couldn't. She didn't want to be just like him, she refused to be him.

Slade coughed as he choked out a few words from his battered and broken jaw "And if I could I would do it all over again."

…Okay so Raven lied, he did deserve what was coming to him.

Raven's arms tensed as she lowered Slade to the ground. She strapped him to the floor with her powers as she casually walked over. By this time the titans had already finished destroying the Slade droids and had their full attention fixed on her.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos." She muttered to herself as she stripped Slade of his upper body uniform, to reveal not a monster, but a person, wearing a black shirt, a pathetic human hiding beneath a suit of armor.

She knelt down beside him and slowly walked her fingers from the top of his chest to his stomach.

"Hey Slade, do you know what it feels like when you get those weird feeling in the pit of your stomach because you feel guilty about letting a monster take over you. Or when you feel uneasy because some kind on inhumane being made you believe your weak and your friends didn't love you?" she asked.

"No, tell me how it feels." Slade said.

"I SAID FEEL!" she screamed out as she used her powers to stab her hand straight through his skin and into his stomach.

"How does it feel Slade? Was it really worth all the fucking pain you put me through?!" she yelled as she clawed at his insides making his body jerk and causing horrible moans of pain to escape his lips.

"Or better yet how does that annoying pain in your chest feel when you get helpless and scared, do you like how that feels?"

She cried out as she dug her arm inside his body puncturing organs and arteries, slowly trying to dismantle him from the inside out. Slade threw his head back and groaned in pain and agony, this torture was something he never saw coming.

"It sucks carrying those feelings, doesn't it Slade, the physical pain is almost as painful and the mental and emotional pain, but you want to know the best part of all this Slade?"

"What?" He managed to groan out through chewed on bloody lips.

"When you live from it." She whispered in his ear as she stood up and levitated her hands over his distraught and ruptured body.

He shrieked out in pain and terror.

"I never said the recovery would be easy, sometimes it the most excruciating part."

Slade could feel her dark magic swimming inside his veins, pulling at his every nerve, turning his stomach upside down. He felt like his bones were splintering, like every organ in his body was about to explode, everything hurt. His lungs felt like they were filled with toxic fumes, he felt a burning sensation running through his legs. His eyes seemed to be bulging out of his head. He felt like someone had stuck a pair of rusty pliers in his mouth and was removing his teeth one by one. He was being cut into from every inch of his skin. Was it really possible for someone to feel this much pain at once and live from it?

"Congratulations, you now know what it feels like to be destroyed." She said as she turned to face her friends who were staring at her in complete and utter shock.

"Raven... you did… you didn't, did you...?" Cyborg mumbled trying not to believe that Raven would kill someone, even if it was Slade.

"No, he's alive, but he's in more pain than imaginable."

Starfire couldn't contain herself anymore and burst into tears as she flew into Raven and embraced her with a hug.

"Oh Raven we have been so worried about, we believed we had lost you for good, oh please you must come home, you are our friend and we will help you, you will come home won't you?" Starfire cried.

Home… go home, oh no, he wanted her to go home more than anything and he was still laying out side a closet…

Raven gasped as she enveloped herself in her Raven form to return to Beast Boy's side.

He was just laying there, so still, with no movements at all. She knelt down beside him hoping it wasn't too late. She could feel something warm all around her… it was blood and a lot of it, but she couldn't see where it was coming from. Raven slowly shifted Beast Boy to see his leg, his bone had broken and punctured straight through his green skin. She felt his arm to discover a very limp pulse. She looked over her shoulder as the other titans rushed in.

"We needed to get him home, NOW!" she screamed.

* * *

_**Yay! Chapter 12 finally**_

_**SO was it good? Bad? Tell me**_

_**I'm hoping to add on two or three more chapters I don't really want it to end yet, but I don't have a lot of time to write either.**_

_**So review it for me !!! If I get a lot of reviews I'll try to make it longer!**_

* * *


	13. Fighting For Life

**Oh My GOD! I'm back! :D**

**Oh no there must be some angry people out there, it seems like forever since I last updated this story.**

**I'm sorry, I've been busy with school and work -.-**

**BUT... I was thinking yesterday that this story needs to have and end, I refuse to let it stay hanging the way it was.**

**so here is a lovely chapter that is longer than usual!**

**Please tell me what you think? (:**

**Love you all!**

**Oh, and so this chapter doesn't get too confusing, basically the scene is switching between what's happening around Beast Boy and what's going on in his head. And the bold words later are what he's thinking in his head aloud. So, get reading! **

It was dark, and the world felt like it was spinning. His throat felt dry and hoarse and his body felt like it was trampled by a stampede. He laid there with his eyes shut wondering why he was in so much discomfort. What had happened? And why couldn't he wake up? He could hear muffled voices surrounding him, they sounded familiar to him, yet like a distant memory all at the same time. He could feel something prodding his arm, ow… OW... hey, that hurts! What was going on? Then his leg, oh God his leg felt like it was burning, and then he could feel someone touching it. Oww.. OWWW, oh God that kills, help, somebody help me please help…

He could hear a beeping sound rising, it was getting faster and faster, someone was screaming, please stop screaming, too much noise please just help, help me! Why is there so much pain, somebody please? Wait why was he in all this pain? What had happened… he had been searching for someone, someone close to him and… owww, stop touching my leg! He couldn't concentrate…

She needed him, she was scared, someone hurt her… but who was she, he had been trying to find her, he wanted to bring her home, she was afraid and she let him in… but it was slipping, there was a light, it was warm, and so inviting. His pain started to slip away as he let his body become consumed by the light, the screams were starting to die down, and everything felt okay again…

* * *

"Robin quick get his IV drip hooked up, I need to set his leg, he's already lost too much blood." Cyborg yelled as he set Beast Boy's frail form down on the bed.

Starfire was standing in the doorframe scared to go anywhere near her dear friend, all she could do was try to hold back her tears as she waited for Beast Boy to be okay.

Raven stood over Beast Boy wiping away the sweat that formed on his forehead as Robin attached the IV. She felt horrible, all of this was her fault, if she had just stayed in the first place and told her friends what had happened all of this could have been avoided, but no… she just had to keep everything to herself. But no, this wasn't the time for that, she couldn't beat herself up right now, Beast Boy needed her, and she needed all of the power she could muster up if she was going to help him.

Suddenly as Cyborg went to touch Beast Boys leg the heart monitor began to beat irregularly.

"Shit, we gotta do this fast. Rob help me hold him down." Cyborg said as he sterilized Beast Boy's leg. His bone had splintered right through the skin.

"Oh no!" Starfire cried as she floated up and hunkered over Beasts Boys twitching form, "Beast Boy please! Please be okay." She cried.

"Starfire you need to back up, Raven get in there and keep his mind calm." Robin ordered as he tried to help Cyborg set Beast Boy's leg into place.

"But… I…" Raven was at a loss, if she went into Beast Boy's mind that meant she would be keeping him calm as they finished setting his leg, and he would feel it all. Or she could wait and hope that Beast Boy could hold on through the whole ordeal and try to heal him as soon as they set his leg.

She stared at Beast Boy's face; his brows were furrowed and scrunched. Sweat was streaming down his face. The veins in his neck were bulging, he was fighting, right now he was fighting to get back here, to get back to her. He had always been there, always fighting for her, whether he was fighting to get her out of her room and make her watch him play video games, or referee a game of stank ball, watch one of his belching contests, or just to hear one of his stupid jokes. He always fought for her to be a part of the group and now, right when she was ready to completely be open and a part of everything, right when she realized that all of them, her friends, the titans really did want her to be on this team, he was slipping away from her. She couldn't let him go, no, this wasn't going to happen.

Beasts Boy's body went limp as his heart rate monitor went flat.

"NOOOOO!" Starfire screamed.

"NO, you are not giving up on me this easily grass stain, stay with us!" Cyborg yelled as he got the shock paddles out.

"Raven if you're going to do something do it now!" Robin yelled, "We're running out of time."

Raven's normally pale face went ghostly white, no it was all unraveling too fast for her to handle, this wasn't how it was supposed to happen, not like this, never like this. Beast Boy was the one that always had a smile on, she couldn't live without seeing his face every day, even if she didn't let on she loved it, it's what made her actually want to come out of her room. And he was slipping away from her. No… no he wasn't, she wasn't going to let him go this easily, Beast Boy would never leave without a fight and she was going to make sure he got through this. He helped her, and now she was going to repay the favor.

"Hang on Beast Boy, I'm coming!" She cried.

* * *

All the pain seemed to be fading away, as the light seemed to pull him in. This warming sensation spread over him and made him forget all of his worldly attachments. Who needs anything when you can feel this at peace he thought as he was slowly drawn in closer and closer, nothing can compare to this. Everything was white around him, a feeling of acceptance washed over him as he was allowing his fate, in the distance he heard an odd noise that sounded out of place, was that the shriek of a raven? Oh well, nothing could feel better than this feeling he was experiencing.

"Beast Boy" said the voice.

That voice… it sounded so familiar, yet…

"Beast Boy please, you have to hold on." Came the voice again.

Hold on? Hold on to what, pain, misery, suffering? No thanks…

"Beast Boy please, you can't leave me, you can't leave us, you have to fight this, you're stronger than this." The voice said, it sounded so broken… so sad…

Who was this voice? It sounded like a distant memory to him, but not like it usually sounded, the voice was usually sad and gloomy, but this one seemed almost desperate.

"Beast Boy I know you're still in there, I know you're fighting, keep holding on."

This was really irritating, he was finally at peace, finally accepting his fate to be drawn into this warm welcoming white light when all of a sudden this voice had to trouble him, maybe if he knew who the voice was it wouldn't trouble him so much, and why did this voice want him to hold on? Why did it even care?

"Beast Boy please, I'm so sorry, so very sorry, if it wasn't for me you wouldn't be in this mess. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you, you were right, I should have opened up and told the rest of the titans what happened to me, I should have trusted your judgment, I should have trusted you, and now thanks to me you're in this mess, but I won't let you stop fighting, I'll never give up on you Beast Boy, so don't you give up… BEAST BOY!" the voice screamed.

* * *

The heart monitor blipped once and then flat lined again.

"Raven keep trying, whatever you're doing is working." Robin said as he began to stitch Beast Boy's leg up from where the bone had broken the skin.

Raven was floating in the middle of the room, her body bobbed up and down slowly as her mind was calling out to that of Beast Boy's. Something was wrong though, the signal to his mind was hazy and becoming more and more distant, but still she had to try. She pushed past all the hurt and pain, in his mind as she wandered through.

She saw a canoe traveling over a waterfall and crash into the rocky waves below as a young green child cried out to the two passengers who fell to their deaths. "Mom, Dad!" But the memory soon faded and a new one began.

She saw Beast Boy wearing his doom patrol hat and uniform as he was being yelled at by a very angry Mento, while Elasti-girl tried to intervene between the two. After a moment this one disappeared as well.

This must be all of Beast Boy's painful memories she thought. But why weren't there any good memories, sure Beast Boy had had a rough life, they all had some skeletons hidden in the closet, but she knew Beast Boy had some happy memories hidden somewhere in here, maybe if she could help him remember them he would fight to stay.

* * *

"Beast Boy." The voice came again.

Wait, that voice… it was all coming back to him now… he knew that voice, he loved that voice, that voice… oh who did that voice belong to… a titan? Yes a titan, wait titans... he remembered them, they were his friends, they must be the ones talking, those must be the voices he could hear. But why did they sound so frantic, he was fine, he was at peace, everything was okay right now, so what was going on.

"Beast Boy answer me, please…" the voice cried out again, "I need to hear you, I need to know that you're still in here, somewhere, please Beast Boy, I… I… I need you, I can't survive if you're not here, not after everything you did to bring me back home, Beast Boy I love you!"

No, Raven… why, wait, why was she upset..

**Raven I'm right here, can't you hear me? Raven, helloooo? **

Why is she so sad, doesn't she know I'm okay. Raven, wait… Raven, she was hurt, really bad, something happened to her, someone hurt her, and made her sad, someone… no, _Slade_… that monster he had attacked her, and wait… it was all coming back to him now, the fight, Raven's four red eyes, his leg, the blood… oh God the blood, was he, oh God… was he was dying...

**Wait, I change my mind, I don't want to go to the light, I want to stay, please don't let me go Raven, I'm here, don't leave me.**

**

* * *

**

The heart monitor blipped twice then flat lined again.

"Oh Beast Boy your friends are here, we need you to be strong, please Beast Boy you just have to be strong you have to be, do not die!" Starfire cried into Robin's side.

He and Cyborg looked on to the still form of Beast Boy and the concentrating body of Raven, they had done all they could do, his leg was set, they were pumping new blood into his body, it was all up to him now, he had to fight for his life.

"Come on Beast Boy, pull through it." Robin said as he rubbed Starfire's back.

"You can't give up BB, not like this." Cyborg said as he hoped for the best.

* * *

Wait, that was Starfire's voice, and Robin and Cyborg's too, they were there, somewhere, they were telling him to fight, but how, how was he supposed to fight?

**Raven...**

"Beast Boy? Beast Boy I can hear you, please hold on.

**Raven… it hurts, I don't know if I can…**

"You can, I know you can, you've made it through the worse you just need to hold on a little bit longer."

**How can you be so confident… how… how can you know… there's so much pain…**

"Because Beast Boy, I've felt the pain too, and I know you can make it, I believe in you, you need to hold on, I can't do this alone. I can't go on if you don't survive this." Raven's voice cried inside of Beast Boy's head.

**Rae… I'll try, but don't be mad if I can't…**

"No, you can Beast Boy, I know you can, and I'll never be mad at you, just try, you can make it, please hold on!"

**Love you Rae…**

**

* * *

**

Raven's body fell out of her meditational stance and she hit the floor.

"Beast Boy!" she cried as she sat up.

* * *

T

T

T

_**Hooray! a cliffhanger right after waiting forever for an update (: was it worth the wait?**_

_**Do you like it? Are you worried? **_

_**Let me know! 3**_


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